A WORD ABOUT BLOGGING AND PARENTING

i have been sharing a bit on here about parenting - things i am working on, successes and failures, joys, and fears sometimes. i share with you stories from our days, thoughts that haunt me, and often i ramble. sometimes lovely people who read this little blog leave me kind responses or sweet words of encouragement. i am grateful and it makes me so happy to hear that such sweet and lovely people are enjoying this little blog. i am happy to have this space to share my adventures as a parent, and i don't plan to stop sharing. 

but today i want to just say this: my blog, and many other blogs show only the best photographs of our children, and the edited stories of our days (yes, even the most honest ones are in some way edited). i do try to be one of those honest people who blog about life's messes, but really, it is not easy to share how lazy of a parent you may have been one day, and it sounds so much better to say that your day was just so terribly tough or horribly tiring, and to lament about how you worked so hard.... blah, blah, blah. i do not tell you how many slices of pie i can shove in my face in just one day. i do not share the photos of the grodiest baby pool ever that chloe decided to sit in on our way out this morning.

because, as much as i like to think of my blog as a place to be honest, to encourage non-judgemental dialogue, and to share my joys and struggles, there are some things that i don't care to remember about our days. i am sure we all have these moments... and in this age of social media, where so much of our lives can be shared, privacy can be a really sweet thing. but as a person who blogs, and also read blogs i often find myself looking at others' photos, or reading their stories and longing for a clean living room, or that naptime wasn't quite so rough... forgetting that these bloggers are people like me, who also show the best photos, share the best memories, and who edit their lives as well.

recently i have been thinking more and more that chloe is a bit of an active child - i don't mean this in a bad way, i do love that she is always on the go. she is fire-y, and bright, and she has such a spirit... she gets so excited. being her mother is a challenge in more than one respect. it is challenging to keep up with and to discipline her, and it is challenging to not squash her spirit. i feel in a constant tension to provide her with all the nurturing she needs and allowing her to run free, while still keeping her safe, happy, and healthy. i get a lot of advice about what i should or should not be doing.... and i listen. i have tried out a lot of what i listen to. but, at the end of the day i feel that i need to do what is best for my child, and i know what this is, even if i have not found it quite yet.... i can feel it in my gut.  some advice i have been given has worked wonders, while other bits just don't feel a good fit for us. i am reading a few good parenting books, and gleaning bits that i feel may work well for our family, but i haven't ever found one book that gives it all to me. i am always leary of giving any advice... other than this: do what feels right for you and your family.

don't feel that allowing them to cry it out is do-able? don't do it.

feel more comfortable sharing a bed with the entire family? go for it.

don't think you even want children? don't have any.

at the end of the day, you need to be able to live with the decisions you make... so read, listen, think, and do what is right for your family. surround yourself with people who support you and love you.

in the coming weeks i am going to be working through some small changes in the things i do with chloe. figuring out what may work better for us, what might be more helpful to her... and i will share these things around here. these posts are not meant to be advice, but just stuff to share (and maybe start a bit of dialogue around here).

... so don't be fooled by all the pretty photos you may see.

but, since it has been mentioned... pretty photos? sure, why not! :)






she took her second trip to the library today... we won't even talk about the first. she was so excited that i could hardly get through two pages of  "the busy spider" before she had to get up to investigate something else. she checked out some books, and played with a computer, but her favorite thing to do was to spin an empty rack meant to hold clear plastic packets of books on cds.




4 comments:

  1. nobody has the parenthood key, sometimes a thing works for a child but not for another, and i repeat, i'm sure you do it perfect!
    and... well, i'm sure if we just talk about problems in our blogs, who would read them? who wants to read sad stuff? for that, we just have to listen to the news...
    happy day.

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    1. you are right - no two children, or parents are the same... and i don't think that one thing works for everyone, and i am far from perfect.

      there is really not much that prepares you for being a parent.

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  2. I'm feeling the same way recently - some days I hardly know how to handle the new "challenges" Judah presents me with! He is bright, and highly active (and mischievous, haha)... I need some ideas about when/how to set boundaries and keep him entertained a stimulated at the same time.

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    Replies
    1. Sarah, it is a challenge deciding when to draw the line and where... what battles to fight, and which ones to let go. i often browse pinterest and the internet for toddler activities that i think chlo will enjoy that we can incorporate into our days, every now and then we strike gold!

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